absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
Lauren will drop me off I'll be drunk ride you for a little bit and then you can go to sleep
sorry. that wasn't for you
We're official. Living with your boyfriend sounds so much better than fucking your roommate.
He was sweet. He even warned me that his dick curved, and I quote, "more than a banana."
We can talk about your dick in my throat after a decision is made, this is my hair we're talking about. .. shit's important.
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
My throw up tasted like pumpkin, fall is right around the corner.
Also I am throwing a blaZer over what I wore to bed and calling it an outfit.
When he's drowning in your chest and he muffles out the words 'I just want to live here' that's a compliment right?
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
I hate when I wake up and find my vibrator next to me. Such a waste of an orgasm...getting myself off in my sleep and not remembering
I just made my dating life into my own game show. would you like to meet the contestants? (photos not included)
Went to bed still wearing my bralette. When I was changing this morning, a Tootsie Roll fell out. I'm definitely living my best life.
Fuck you, i'm all jacked up on bananas lets go somewhere
I'm drunk and don't know where I am. There's a giant metal penguin if that helps.
Randomize