I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
Maybe my heart is located in my vagina
i wanna pet his head its so fluffy. were gonna open a petting zoo
The last good decent convo we has was when I was trying to convince you to let me watch you pee.
I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.
Let's drink?
Just because it's bacon vodka doesn't mean it's for breakfast.
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
WHY ARE THERE SO MANY BURPS IN MY SMALL, INCREDIBLY ATTRACTIVE BODY
We had sex and then I offered him a cookie...while he was still inside of me. Basically he's in love
Hey guys.. So I accidentally broke the front door last night
I'm at the store buying a new phone cause I pissed all over mine last night. Drunk me is expensive as shit.
So my balls are accidently making an appearance on snapchat
I'm going to target high, just in case I ask you where my paycheck went later
never have sex with a mint flavored condom on. my vagina is on fire.
Randomize
