I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
you might get a letter about the baby you put in me. i was mad when i sent it.
This girl I work with, who is 18 btw, invited me to her baby shower. Do they sell abortions in gift certificate form?
you would not believe what I got pierced last night...
son, I feel like that is a phrase a father never wants to hear.
Do you think it would be a good idea to mention in my admissions essay that I was the guy that streaked across the soccer field last year?
Okay Im going to go have some sex apparently. I hope this chick is prepared the zero effort Im going to put into it.
He called my vagina a rainforest. This is coming from a guy whose pubes are longer than his dick.
This is how I ended up being the slutty friend isn't it?
Sorry I forced you to take an adderall at 1am and then proceeded to dance to Lose Yourself outside of Qdoba.
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
Some toppless girl just walked past me in the hall and gave me half a carton of smokes. I have never been more aroused.
Is 1:30 too early for the bar?
Do you want my opinion or society's?
I want your company
i tried giving myself a bikini wax.1. i hate you 2. i think i'm dying
He broke his arm in a fistfight with the bouncer. it was neat.
Just found out the last guy I hooked up with is being held in a federal prison under suspicion of stealing 175k.
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