Had sex five times today because there was nothing else to do. I had no idea snow days could get even better than when we were kids
No, i went to get it done but the guy couldnt find it. exhibit A of why i wanted a clit piercing in the first place.
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
I don't know if I have the sustained energy level for partying hard
Not a choice. You are mistaking my comments as options. My statements are facts. This is what is happening.
Yes, you can 69 in a fiat. But I think I have permanent nerve damage
Beautiful fucking linguistics Shakespeare, but youre still not doing that to my face
She walked home carrying a six pack of beer and someone elses cat
SHE BETTER HAVE BROUGHT BACK MY FUCKING COUCH CUSIONS OR SHES GUNNA GET IT.
yeah...that's gonna come up in court
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
Im part way to drunk.
I wish I had a clear image of the dude who was sucking on my tit outside the bar last night
i just had diarrhea that people from the 1930's would have died from
I woke up the whole house screaming I need my shorts they found me in the kitchen with a bag of strawberries naked
Who wants to play the "pick up your shit from our floor because you're not paying rent or dating either of us" game?
I woke up in the bathroom clutching a stuffed shark. My night was fantastic, thanks for asking.
Randomize
