you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
Well he asked to have a sober hang out so i guess that constitutes as a date in college
I have diapers under my sink. trying to convince myself to use them.
you're just mad cause i madeout with you while having a mouth full of chewed pretzels
I would ask why there is a chair tied to the door of the fridge.. but I am not sure anyone knows the answer.
jake and the teradactyl broke up, operation get high and find him a new girl who hasn't had sexual experiences with three delts simultaniously is in full effect.
And THIS is why we get drunk. No good story, documentation, or event happens by eating a salad. Alcohol consumption leads to good things
I heard moaning and ass slapping and sponge bob.
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
I am going to be so excited tomorrow when I find this box of crayons in my purse
If you hear a loud thud and smell ozone, I may have been electrocuted.
so go get some goddamn bacon and lay in his bed naked. he'll love it.
I'm definitely closer to having sex in every building on campus than I am to having a post-graduation career/plan/future. Unless that future is getting fucked in lots of buildings. I got that shit on lock down.
THE COP WHO TOOK MY MUGSHOT LAST NIGHT JUST ADDED ME ON FACEBOOK
Sooo does anyone wanna tell me why I threw up a cigarette this morning?
OMG YOU DID TO?!
Randomize
