Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
I am midnight drunk by noon
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
look, i dont wanna be "that girl" but if someone offers me coke in exchange for sex, i cant say no.
My 16 year old coworker just told me I should take my job more seriously after she watched me puke in the backroom trash can. Fuck teenagers with morals.
You are number one in my heart. But in the dick Olympics you're disqualified.
I'm so jealous of your sex life. You know it's awesome when thinking about the sex you had last night brings you tears of joy.
Put a Santa hat on my junk. He's wants to be festive too.
just the thought of you slurpin down noodles really rustles my jimmy
you suck at sexting
Do you think you could cook pancakes while i blow you?
His name was toto. That should have been my red flag
there is puke in my bra ... again
I swear I only fuck him for the huge bottle of smart water he gives me afterwards.
Stop saving videos when you’re using my pornhub account!!! My girlfriend just tried to finger my butt because she thinks I’m into that
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