where am i from again
you're out of your mind
you look like daphne blake and he looks like fozzie bear
it's like he rubbed a lamp and wished you into existence
I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
the trash is collected at 5:50 on mondays. i was up puking all night and heard them
I just learned you can mail a coconut. I'll be over in 3 days with the rum.
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
You told the cop at mobil to keep it real and look both ways before crossing the street.
the only thing you and i have in common is the we like weed and looking at my naked body.
So I walk in and he's teaching someone in London via Skype how to roll a blunt. I have new found respect for him.
We couldve played the bring a random boy to lunch game but i made him go home
Every time he asks me if I'm horny I'm just like come on...stupid question
You puked on yourself, then demanded to take shower. In which you kept saying "its raining"
Once again, your first date sounds like something of an epic. Odysseus' Quest for Fourth Base.
why is there a shopping cart in my back seat? and a dick drawn on the side of my car?
When we were in Vegas he tried to get an Elvis impersonator to act dead on a toilet so he could take photos. This is even worse
Randomize
