can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
Oh I also wanted to thank you for leaving your list of porn sites on the coffee table. Very entertaining.
the only reason i invite her is so when the guys start to hit on her i know it's time to take their keys
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
Received a verbal warning at work for "riding in a trash receptacle, violating professionalism & infection control."
I can't decide if the sex was so good I couldn't move, or if it was me being loaded on all the morphine that they shot me up with at the ER.
Normally this is when girls give blow jobs. That's how you mentally condition them to put up with PMSing, because they see the shinny blowjob light at the end of the tunnel.
WHAT THE FUCK KIND OF NINTENDO FILLED GLORIOUS ENCHANTING FANTASY LAND ARE YOU IN?! DUDE DID YOU MOVE TO THE 90S?!?!?!
At the bar, some guy bumped into you and you screamed "hey, don't touch what you can't afford sunshine!"
In that case, if you come anywhere near my house you can expect to be chased down various streets by a half naked me wielding a baseball bat. No, I am not giving you my address.
Why so serious bruh
I've orgasmed four times in the past 24 hours. And my mom's dropping off cookies later
I'm just gonna back away slowly and come back when there's less weird crap.
Soo I'm in the trunk of a car drunk about to jump on trampolines. My life rocks!
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
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