i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
She wrote me a poem titled "Penis Flower" and it wasnt a joke
now you know why we've never bought a 12 pack of king cobras before.
This is the last pregnancy scare i've had since i was 12 and i thought you could get pregnant from masturbating.
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
We shaved off his eyebrows I'm pretty sure his fiance will be thrilled at the wedding
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
We just weren't working out together, on a completely unrelated note some guy that i talked to on his grinder account said i could crash at his place
I envy your ninja level of don't give a fuck
My dog got laid yesterday. Some lady came over with her husky to breed. He did it like a champ. I was so proud
Just Peed in a cup for my country. Fighting the good fight.
What's worse having drunken sex with hot married man or breaking the diet one week in?
Is it something I'm going to want to hug you for or slap you for?
gave out my moms phone number instead of mine last night... thattttttttttttttt dunk.
I had a date last night. His dog threw up in his bed while we were having sex in it.
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