Moved my bed either I'm a whore or every guy I have ever slept with hid condom wrappers under my bed
Men with bald spots should not have mohawks. Just in case you didn't know.
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
She was stumbling around looking for her cat. She said i could help, but i had to call him by his jungle name
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
He would have to make magical things happen in my nether regions to actually make me vote republican.
Last night did I take a piece of pizza out of your hand and then proceed to eat it?
Twice...
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
Got too starbucks. 3out of the 4 girls working i have ducked and haven't ever called. My coffee has dick written on it. It may contain spit by pumpkin lattes are only once a year
We don't know where he is but he left his pants and what appears to be a tooth here so he's gotta come back sometime
She just called at a dance party, and you stopped mid puke to join. Another successful night.
Just had a smooth transition from sexting to buffalo chicken dip 😂😂😂
Your skills amaze me
That’s all I need in life: vibrators, butt plugs, strawberry lube, and sour gummies
Randomize
