My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
is it a bad sign that i now think of my run-ins with cops as "skill building seminars"?
um, yeah. i think it is.
I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
Pretty sure I saw a dude across the room give this girl the international hand gesture for "I'm going to fist you later", she seemed ok with it.
two gay guys came in and bought just a kite and a box of wine. Why cant I have saturday nights that awesome
Good morning sunshine. Care to hear the riveting tale of Michelle and the Almost Great Night That Ended In An Early Morning of Karma Emptying It's Bowels On Her Guilty Shoulders?
I started having a bad trip because I closed my eyes and got lost in a forest of patterns and I knew my mom would be upset.
He recreated the night that started all my mothers days. We shared a joint, drank Boones Farm, and dry humped to the Beastie Boys. Then I cried over MCA's death. Best. Gift. Ever.
They invented a new game at work. Its called guess if I'm baked, hungover, drunk, or some combination of the three. Its surprisingly very difficult..
I find it fascinating that she'd be more comfortable with her mom finding out she submits dirty disney confessions on tumblr than about her secret email account she uses to chat with dutch and brazilian strangers.
sorry I called you to cry about the state of the neopets economy
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
My boss is paying me to come clean his house in a maid outfit and told me not to tell anyone....this is shady as fuck but I need the money
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
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