Wish i knew that 10 minutes ago when i told him to dance with my blackberry while i got another drink
Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
he told me I talked like a deaf person
its a saturday night. im home alone watching legally blonde, eating week old birthday cake and drinking milk out of the carton. so yeah im doing real well
when does it stop being whiskey dick and start just being me bad in bed?
She was so adorably desperate I didn't have the heart to tell her I wasn't a lesbian. So now She's making waffles, may switch teams over this.
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
I'm in the power napping at parties stage of my life
dont eat that thats our sex nutella.
well don't blame me. sometimes vibrators go missing and people get angry. these things happen
you are like the bill nye of illicit activities
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
I need to find a more reliable booty-call so I can start dating people and take it slow.
Just seriously saw this chick say, watch this motherfuckers then did a 42 sec keg stand.
You at least asked for her number right?
It may be a corded vibrator from the 90s but it gets the job DONE
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