It was like a mary poppins bag, except a sexual mary poppins bag.
If you want her to think you're a true humanitarian, you may want to stop referring to Hands Across America as "the Ghostbusters 2 of fund raisers."
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
remind me to tell you what i found stuck to me this morning
I was just handed a mimosa the size of my head. Stay tuned.
My roommate didn't flush after her miscarriage. Time to drink myself blind. I need you for moral support. Or so I don't have to drunkenly cry alone anymore. Whatever, help.
He gave me a trycicle he stole from a kid as an "offering" to have sex. I couldnt say no when he went through all that.
She has a tattoo on her inner thigh that's an x with a long dotted line. So after she passed out I signed it. Dunno what else I was supposed to do...
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
I had to rub one out before the Shabbat dinner in case I find a nice Jewish girl to fuck me in the bathroom.
Your mother would be so proud
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
Ultimate fat girl moment: I promised him my mouth for the night if he bought me a funnel cake..
Buying a new bed right now. My options are limited because I need to be able to be tied to it.
The coast is clear - also, would it bother you if I chose not to wear pants?
thanks for passing me through your vagina 20 years ago today. your the best
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