You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
you always know who the new freshman are on fb because theyre always wearing prom dresses
Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
Shark Week. Kick off begins Sunday. The drinking game has been upgraded to include jumping/breaching sharks and Jake's not allowed to bring the harpoon. Period.
I'm currently witnessing my drunk neighbor attempting to fold laundry on his front lawn. I think he's trying to spell out HELP.
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
Love is....waiting for your girl to throw up her shot in the bathroom...then handing her her beer. Game face.
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
I'm 25 and I shit my bed last night. And I'm telling you about it. Not sure which is worse
Reports of my death were greatly exaggerated.
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
I danced with a french guy who licked the sweat off my neck and poured a drink on me. Not gonna lie, that shit was refreshing
I tried to get more sleep but the universe decided I needed a drunken freshman instead
if he ever tells me he loves me when we are sober, i am a goner. just fyi.
Someone keeps hanging up bible verse posters in the bathroom stall I masturbate in at work.
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