i may have used way too many innuedos last night. i scared him off. but really... how could i pass up "stimulus package" and "flacid economy." don't answer that.
ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
i'm at the point now where i want him to say anything. even an apology for his boomerang-shaped penis would be nicer than no comment.
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
Fuck now we have to have sex
What?
In a bet, need to win
oh no, im for sure still drunk. i wana eat evrything in the fancy feast commercial... everything
Also, never say you're cool with a threesome if they ask. That shit's a trap.
all 3 of us brought blondes home last night. all 3 are passed out. we're gonna switch rooms and see how long until one of them notices.
he told me to hold it and try to write my name in the snow and it seemed like a bonding moment because neither one of us had ever done that before. i didn't anticipate it vibrating and weirding me out therefore making me let go and get my hand peed on.
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
A beef tasting is not what I needed while hungover
He will be forever remembered as "birthday failure" ...Got him to pierce his tongue in my bathroom, but not sleep with me......
I used to shoot steroids in my ass but for a totally different reason
I just thought I should tell you that I always know what you are doing. Everywhere. Every time. -Your loving Mother
Randomize
