Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
she showed up with nothing but olive garden breadsticks in her purse.
just start off by saying "hey, i cockblocked my friend last night and need to make it up to him, could you help?"
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
Just so were clear I meant the head your face is on
All I know is that I woke up in a soccer players' dorm, and he said that I kept telling him my mouth was a "net for his balls" last night at the bar..
His dad gives me dirty looks whenever I come over though. I think it's because I eat his food and have sex with his son.
HIS NAME IN MY PHONE IS JOSHUA DREAMCHASER I CAN NOT
NO SHAME NOVEMBER
That's what I love about being a lesbian. My roommate's boyfriend watched her finger me and then he made me pancakes in the morning. AND THEN HE LEFT.
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
You wanna see what happens when frozen corn meets an unhappy Andrew's face?
You know it was a good night when visa fraud prevention services are calling
I told him he looked like my uncle.
Why would you say that in a bathtub?
He grabbed a pine cone off the ground and yelled "I love cigars" then tried to smoke it for ten minutes.
He was tied up with the electrical tape and force fed wine from a box. It was never going to end well.
Randomize
