Please, let me fuck your mom
You flung your panties at that guy you liked with an accuracy that I have never seen before.
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
My teachers should feel privileged to see me this morning, after the amount of alcohol I consumed last night.
My mom said I should get that 'not fucking anybody' problem fixed.
He skyped me to learn how to roll a joint and for us to masturbate together. And you said a long distance relationship wouldn't work.
I don't think he wanted to hear that my most serious relationship was my 1 1/2 year fuck buddy... I think he figured out that's where he's heading
I feel more comfortable going down on her then actually kissing her.
Dude, all I know is that I came out of this thing wearing a snorkel mask and completely covered in glitter and soap.
I'm adopting to save the world from the moral outrage that would be my offspring
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
Google Maps needs to have a hungover setting. That bitch talks too loud and all I want is breakfast tacos & a bloody fucking mary.
And on a positive note i found a list that i made in 3rd grade titled "what to do if you want a guy to like you"
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
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