That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
girl you didnt miss much. except me passing out for 3 hours AT JOBBIE NOONER on some random's boat. i was topless, then completely naked. heard girls were throwing ice cubes at me. i was useless. remember nothing.
i dont think my boyfriend knows how much of a pain it is to shave my ass
She fell down the stairs and hit her head on the concrete. Then she stood up, flashed us and stumbled away. I forgot to get her number..
her roommates boyfriend drunkenly walked in on us banging and said yeeeeaaaaaahhhh and tried to high five me
Well you really should've thought of that before you painted your walls the same color as your toilet
professor came back from spring break missing a tooth
My vagina bone hurts from grinding on that dude so hard.
Am I really that girl who walks around half naked wearing a cowboy hat begging for liquor at some random guys house
Yeah then you killed that bottle of Bacardi in under 20 minutes. So much for being an organ donor.
You will bone me until my eyeballs fall out. This is not a request.
we're spending all day in bed drinking spiked eggnog and fucking
In hindsight, I probably should not have let the waiter give me a chiropractic adjustment on my neck last night.
Should we make a shared Google doc list of places we want to fuck? Like a scavenger hunt?
Either my apartment is haunted or I'm far more drunk than I thought
Randomize
