To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
i left with the words "thank you for undersanding my sluttiness"
Just now remembered singing Trashy Women at the reception. Not karaoke, just sang along with the mic I stole from the DJ. All while still in my dress drinking champagne from the bottle
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
So I get to my parents and walk in the door so my mom knows I'm safe and alive and my grandpa looks at me and says "were you being someone's bitch". And I about died of laughter
Wow, he seems so solid
I found my grandmother's vibrator, how was your day?
Would seriously like to slash his tires but then I feel like I'd have to deal with him longer.
I have a terrible feeling that I made out with a fraternity last night
Take off your clothes and see if he wants to have sex, that's a good way to find out
A person can only vomit Fireball so much before they quit it forever
And all i could do was bury the part of me that felt guilty for cradle robbing and put on my dick swallowing bib.
I think I sent pictures of my boobs to an Olympic athlete...
The weekend was a blur. There was vodka and penises and orgasms. I played a game of Cock Roulette and won big
It was weird, it was like my heart got a boner. Is this being an adult?
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