This is a mass text. Does anyone know where I am?
Hey guys, just to let you know, I have a boyfriend...so that hookup was kind of a one time thing.
was that a mass text??
i can't believe i brushed your teeth last night. so drunk.
I woke up to three texts telling me to "go fuck myself," a panicked voicemail from my mom, and a girl thanking me... I'm not sure which I should take care of first
So I vaguely remember making out with you this morning, I think you were on a date?
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
He's in a nude suit, bald, with a pink headband and a black sharpie streak down his forehead.
On duty sugar tits. A Marine never abandons his post to take nudi pics.
Lab coat again saves the day - hiding embarrassing shart evidence...
I got turned off after he said, "i can see us in the future...me, you, and a back yard full of alpacas."
I'm not sure when I will get off this toilet at work but it's not looking promising
IT IS NICKEL SHIT NIGHT
*shot. Why
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
We both shit in the same closet in Santa Fe. Nothing is sacred anymore.
The last time I went out with these guys I won an iced tea maker from a drag queen.
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