What are you drinking?
Shitty Coors light. OM NOM NOM TASTES LIKE HIGH SCHOOL
did you ever find your cell phone? and your dignity?
Ok. Also I almost just threw up. Seriously. I was think to myself "really? Here? Now? At my work desk?" and then it went away.
Apparently I climbed into a dryer last night and refused to leave... There are pictures to prove it
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
I have to be home in time to watch my friend on that Lifetime show about having babies. And by friend, I mean the girl I had a lesbian experience with at a party 3 years ago.
After he was done he gave me a case of landshark and tickets to tomorrows yankee game. This is the best nonrelationship ever
When did we convert life to cartoon?
Two run-ins with cops/park rangers tonight and now I'm just wandering around high and shirtless
Sacramento doesn't deserve you
Did I fall on/off the boat yesterday? Cuz my right leg looks and feels like if it got hit by shrapnel.
WHERE THE FUCK'S MY FUCKING RITALIN YOU FUCKING FASCIST?????
There's a fine line between kinky and serial killer
Got caught up in a real life love triangle. Both guys wanted me. I'm tempted to just run off with the cute girl from McDonalds instead
Please do that
I feel asleep with my contacts in, with my arms wrapped around a bottle of vodka. Also... Do we have class today?
They want a bedroom just for their cats. And you thought we were gay.
Randomize
