We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
she's into porn, im staying here tonight
If you dont, I will tell Dad you are gay.
Fine, and I will tell him you fucked his business partner
Previous statement retracted.
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
she acted like she'd never seen someone do speed off of a desk with a rolled up receipt. and she calls herself a grad student.
Things got outta hand once she told me to water-board her with Patron.
Eh, not fuck buddies. I prefer sexercise partner.
Ur gonna wake up early as dick tomorrow to do some responsible shit but im the one up at 3 am right now cooking brats soaked in keystone light so fuck your falling asleep ass bitch
She had sex in a public bathroom and slept on a couch in the dorm lobby. It's only Monday
Did I really make him pull over to give the homeless guy my bra?
I sucked his dick by a creek, how romantic.
I got very very very high last night and bought a cotton candy machine on eBay
My plan to hit on all your friends went to shit after the 3rd dirty martini.
Social anxiety problems: I just had to get up and change stalls mid-poop because someone sat down in the one next to mine.
I teamed up with my vagina. I compromised his morals and then she corrupted him for good. It’s been a very successful and slutty partnership
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