If that was your dad, he is hot
I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
It was the single greastest thing to happen to my dick ever
If I was doing exactly what I wanted right now I would be getting fucked on a jet ski while listening to "When Love Takes Over" by Kelly Rowland while eating french fries.
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
Walked girl from last night to car as gf was driving up. Got slow clap from neighbors.
For gods sake, I only took one. With two nyquils. What a happy world its been today. Fulfill your obligations and then its marvelouso.
I've already agreed to hook up with 3 people tonight, and its not even 2:00 yet... I think this is what the path to success looks like.
I slept with an Israeli and a Palestinian in the same day. It feels wrong.
If you want it you better put a ring on it. And by ring I mean one of my three favorite pies.
It's not as funny as it sounds. I shit myself at the company Christmas party.
I have 3 bottles of vodka in my room telling me not to go to work tomorrow.
I did what i always do when i miss him; masturbate and watch Bridges of Madison County.
she broke a 50 dollar bottle of alcohol. then passed out in front of her car and got sprayed by a skunk
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
Randomize
