perhaps when you are drinking red wine from a tall glass with a straw it is time to call it a night.
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
After doing lines off my chest, she said, "do you even know how fast I could suck your cock right now?!!" and her friend said, "yea she totally could".
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
I was wondering if I fell or perhaps got hit by a truck, then I remembered, it's cause I did a splits contest at the bar
I'm beer bonging chocolate fondue. That's how my Valentines Day is going.
Also I'm at the pub and there are old lady pirates gyrating on a pole. I wish you were here.
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
I'm fine with our borderline lesbian behavior.
OMG he dropped his pants for me. Granted it was to show me where he got stabbed but still...
he's so sweet and its so cute. but I swear to fuck if I let my guard down and this was all a lie I am going to become a serial killer.
I accidently sent a dick pic to the group chat with her family. Right after they all said it was a pleasure having me for dinner. Wana drink with me?
His sister hates me so I took his virginity on her bed
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