I'll collect that couch/porn sloopy beedge tomorrow just FYI
Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
I feel like I can hear facebook. What did we smoke?
OMG IM A TIGER AND I LOVE ROARING
I cancelled the entertainment for your b-day party.... Keep the bouncy castle just in case.
was it wrong to tell him he's welcome in my pants any time?
I feel very compelled to cut off the person's ears that is sitting in front of me
Keywords: shitstorm, police, jail.
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
Me too like the fact they didn't arrest me wants to send them an edible arrangement
I was intimate with him for twenty minutes and will be intimate with shame for twenty years.
I couldn't have possibly been that bad
You had her flip the penny over to the lucky side before you picked it up and ate it...
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
Randomize
