Yeah but my nose is so stuffed if I tried to give him head I'd suffocate
OMG Im so trashed fishy! im sitting hereon my bed wif mcdonalds n i look like david hasselhoff!!!!!! kill me now
haha my mom just sent us out to go to all of the hair cutting places to ask for hair because deer ate all our zuchini.. and we have to pee in a bucket all day cause deer hate urine. please tell me we are normal?
i cant lie to you.
you'd think he'd be slightly more humble with a penis that small
I will fuck a handful of worms if you hold them
Judging by the grocery store, everyone stocked up on frozen pizza and beer for the blizzard. If our generation ever faces doomsday, we'll go out smiling.
I saw a girl walking around campus with bandages on both her knees. I need to get her number.
This glow in the dark vibrator will get me through this power outage
I've got 15 minutes to eat dinner and drink a 40. Four years of college has all been training for this moment.
i think the penis that was inside of me changed my life
Please tell me that is you having sex in my car in my driveway and not a complete stranger.
At some point he mentioned fried rice and take out... I don't think we know how sexting works
When you licked the fourth stranger's cheek the bar tender pretty much ordered us to get you out.
Just when I thought I was growing up, I go out and TOTALLY REDEEM MYSELF
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
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