the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
i just yelled "run, its godzirra!" to an asian kid who looked confused by the tornado alarm test
And then like 10 minutes later they were taking a bath together. HOW DOES HE DO IT.
Then, he just started shoving orange pieces in my mouth as a chaser
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
The more I stare at her and block out what she's actually saying with thoughts of what she could be saying, the more interested I become
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
i thought i should point out that whatever else you can say about me, i've still gotten high with a midget.
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
And then I cried about the Cubs for a half hour. If my dignity hadn't already been lost by that point in the night, it sure as hell was then.
Trying to stay sober at a family function but hiccuping so fucking loud. "Have you been drinking?" I hit on my cousin so yeah. I have been drinking.
The last thing I need is a possessed urethra.
Sorry I blacked out in bed
it was real late and you were brushing your teeth with miller light. it was bound to happen.
Plan b and 5 hour enegery breakfast of a champion
You said you made a new recipe, but it turned out you just cooked ramen with vodka instead of water.
Randomize
