dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
I just made princess spaghettios..and I wonder why she broke up with me for not being mature enough.
He was eating her out on the elevator. What a good man.
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
Haha jealous. If I could remember my dreams I'm pretty sure they would constantly be about being drunk in foreign countries
and by clear my head i mean get drunk and cry myself into oblivion.
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
She left a blanket, pillow, a glass of water, and two advils in the bathroom for me. It's like she knew. Best room mate ever.
i was enjoying my post acid trip trance a little too much. i found $50 on the sidewalk but didnt pick it up. just stared at the bill cuz it looked cool.
someone picked it up and i stared at the ground where it was for probably another minute or 2
I'm on the bus, watching a girl shush her balloons.
Bringing my cat to a booty call was not my finest hour
It took me longer to finish the bottle of scotch we bought together on New Years than it did for her to meet a new guy and get engaged
She thinks you guys are the gods of the bathroom. If she runs past you naked, give me a heads up
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
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