Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
just opened a can of spagetti o's with a butter knife. the things u will do for food when ur stoned.
i gave her a can of corn and told her the cabs are accepting non perishable food items over the holidays. blatant lie and she lives like $40 away
I mean turning down birthday sex is never the answer
No dude I got way too drunk to function. 90% sure I tried to FaceTime 911.
And don't try to lose a condom in me tonight. My vagina is not a storage compartment where you can just leave something and try and use it again later in the week.
The doctor that gave me my std test is trying to hook me up with her daughter lol
Her text was so long it had an arrow to expand it. You know it's bad when even your iPhone can't handle her
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
You are cordially invited to the annual finals week stress relief drinking binge at our manor this evening
I'm so upset I left my sombrero at the expo center
and idk now I have nine bags of lettuce in my fridge
I don't know why this person would ask for help. It sounds pretty OK to me. Also, I'd steal those bagpipes.
I found my parents stash of sex toys. You know my green one? My mom has it...in purple. I HAVE THE SAME VIBRATOR AS MY MOTHER
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
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