I just fell for a fake 50 dollar bill in a urinal. Fuck pittsburgh
I'm drinking while I write this paper. When I can't see the screen anymore I'm gonna come out
I just sneezed alcohol in a candle and started a fire.
You showed the cops outside of the bar your boobs and then decided to go apologize to them. They admitted that the reason they hung out there was because of girls like you.
She is two pictures of justin bieber away from being blocked from my news feed
he sounded really stupid. it was like his puke had a stutter, too.
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
He just showed me a video of his erect penis moving to the beet of the music when he was high, I think I'm in love.
His IQ is so high, I swear I started ovulating when he told me the number.
Just watched a girl fall down the stair and be to drunk to get up. The only stair in the bar. It's like watching a turtle on it's back.
He stole all of his parent's vodka WHILE they were in the room, and then opened the window and snuck out. I was watching from my truck
As a Chick-Fil-A employee, I think you'd appreciate the visual of me almost accidentally pulling out my wallet with a thong hooked on it as I payed for my waffle fries just now.
I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
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