Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
I'm convinced that Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick are the same person...
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
I'm so sorry man. Roger cartwheeled into a signpost and cut his face open. it was pretty messy so we all went into panic mode.
I guess our biggest consolation is that we haven't woken up in a hottub with a dead dude. Yet.
My goal tonight is to get arrested because what cop can say they have ever arrested a giant sperm before. God I love halloween
Legitimate logistical question....how did you pee in your duct tape dress?
You should really trust me on this one. "hit it and quit it" might not be the best career move on your part...
I seriously don't understand how you keep getting laid.
Because I'm like the spider of false hope. I spin elaborate tales and snare them in my web of utter disappointment. They soon realize their mistake, but by then it's too late.
Dude, on the way home the cab driver asked why you didn't bring a guy home and referred to you as "one night stand girl"
We got out of the car in valet drinking beers we gave the valet one as a tip
Apparently when cookies are around I think of myself as a puppy and reward myself for everything #WhoIsAGoodBoy
Randomize