my mom just found my bong and asked what it was. I told her it was a hookah
and she bought it?!?
yeah...but her friends at work told her hookah was fun and now she wants to smoke it with me...im thinkin yes
Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
He showed me a four inch blond hair that grows out of his side. He calls it his little ray of sunshine. Please come get me.
She fell onto my light and broke all four plants. I don't care how good the blowjob was.
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
I need to find out this kids work schedule. I need mustache rides on my lunchbreaks.
I really enjoy how cavalier you're being about your chlamydia
I don't know what happened. His phone, shirt, shoes, and the condom wrapper are here but he isn't. I don't even know how to get a hold of him right now
Lindsey Lohan and I have slept with the same amount of people. The only thing she's now beating me on is rehab trips and teen choice awards, so really I'm the winner.
I don't know if dry shampoo will fix the decisions we made last night.
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
You thought they were asking for volunteers for a karaoke contest so you jumped up not realizing it was actually a "last 3 minutes boxing match". But you took that right hook like a champ.
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
Right before he dumped me... he got a really ugly pair of pants. They were twill pants. A pinkish color. When I'm sad... I picture him in them. It makes me smile.
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