he texted me telling him i gave him the clap. but i think he gave it to me and i gave it back to him
Apparently oprah and I were in competition to see who's ass could get bigger this summer
Just toasted a glass of brandy with my own reflection to my dimples. Why are you not here?
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
Going to pass out with da shoes on. hugging wallstreet journal from tuesday. please check me for liveliness in the morning.
Please talk me out of ordering the stripper pole for a dollar. Please.
he's only going to be home for two days, his dick is going to be in me for the whole 48 hours, he doesnt have a choice.
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
I woke up at 6am to a knock and a naked guy at my window.
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
I'm attracted to him because he looks like the kind of guy who would lick my asshole without me having to ask.
The last two times I had sex with him I forgot who it was half way through
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
Tell him that his phone is taped to the dog's stomach. Stop trying to call it because it makes him scared.
Randomize
