very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
everything was going good until you started showing off the pictures of poop you took with your phone
Just walked by a yard full of girls wearing bikinis. I did my best to stare.
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
Just croosed over that too drunk for chemistry class line
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
She's high and running across rooftops. Yes we're going to end up in A&E again.
I wore heels to a golf store in hopes of getting laid. I've hit a new all time low.
I have a bad feeling I'm going to like this fuck buddy
He has great taste in girls. I feel closer to my Eskimo sisters than my real sister...
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
THERE ARE LEGITLY 4 SEPARATE BITE MARKS ON MY DICK. WHAT. THE. FUCK.
Legitimately*
Go fuck yourself
Randomize
