I've eaten ice cream, mentos, an extreme gulp and swedish fish today. i feel like diabetes. the actual disease not a person with it.
How do I put "special brownies" into Weight Watchers?
I came home to my brother stoned out of his mind. He got a high score on COD and asked me to have a celebration yogurt with him.
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
I met a bunch of Germans and said in german "this is for the fatherland" and poured a beer on my head
Eight drinks in. Subject is fondling chips before eating them. Intoxicated texting has expanded from best friend to random guy I met in FBLA.
I woke up in a strange bathroom. Was I blonde when you left me last night?
When that bartender tried to tell us he sang like Sade, I knew it was time to go
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
I just scored a new eye doctor and a date all in one email. BOOM!
I just kept thinking.. Holy shit. We're fucking in my front yard.
Within the first 2 minutes of this morning, I found out the Lions lost on last play, and Scott Weiland died. I wont be in today.
So my ex vomited in front of my door and passed out there
This is the fifth time tonight that girl has taken off my pants. Take me home. Now.
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
Randomize
