I want to come over to your house, give you money for liquor, fuck you, and then kick it untill I have to go home. Was that blatent enough for you?
Almost ran you over in the parking lot. You look good
Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
just to let you know, don't open your linen closet for a while until i come over with a cleaning kit and geek squad
my clit piercing makes the metal detector go off
i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
You should have been there. We got drunk and threw a sword through his windshield.
Just saw my father's penis. Don't know what to say.
I tried to put the left over margartia in a box for you but they wouldn't let me
I am literally missing a chunk of eyelashes. That's how fun it was.
there is no amount of schooling that prepares you for when your morbidly obese 45 year old patient tells you she has her clit pierced.
Do you think there are two dudes living in an apartment somewhere that go to the store and call it Brocery shopping?
Oh god...probably.
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
I made him leave to get me chicken nuggets so I could have sex with his roommate
Randomize