I hope you have a really shitty weekend. I love you.
Lesson 1: you can't keep macking on a girl if you get handcuffed
So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
I just smoked pot in front of my old Elementary School. It's like my Childhood and Adulthood are coming together in this awesome thing.
He just kept petting my ear and informing me that I wasn't one of the guys
Beware of calls from Dad. I just had a longer than I would care to admit convo about the ididarod. Apparently it starts tomorrow.
Saturday evening, however, will be my vodka and bubble wrap extravaganza.
Omg. Some dude is jacking off in Kelly's bathroom.
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
And the next morning he asked me why I had clothes on so I said so that he could take them off again.
It was at the same house, but a different party, when lesbians set me on fire. So there's that.
do you think there's enough of the fabric you gave me to make a crop top for a cat?
If I shall die, I wish to bequeath to you my personal library, my sigma tau delta presidency and all it's apparel, and a puppy.
Randomize
