so after the bed broke we walked out of the room to a standing ovation
I just ordered a 3 square foot pizza. This is how to beat an eating disorder.
dude skip the party. it is a fucking post office here
what the hell does that mean?
nothing good but a whole lotta male and packages
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
Apparently I blacked out and pissed all over the sliding glass door from the inside, as everyone watched from the outside helplessly....
You'd think if the campus holds 28,000 undergrad I wouldn't run into three people I've hooked up with in one day
He makes this seasoned whore feel like a novice. I've met the one.
I'm serious. My alarm label is "BAR TABS" as motivation for me to wake up in the morning and go to work.
Also, what is a socially acceptable way to introduce a crossbow in public?
Don't talk to me about scholarly dedication until you've taken a final in boxers, a bloody tank top and a zip tie to hold your hair back. I wear the most sullied 4.0 crown of all time....
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
He used a trumpet as a funnel, said something about valve oil, and puked all over the garage.
I was mad at him...then I jerked off. Now I'm over it. Orgasms fix everything, I swear.
MY HAND WILL BE UP HIS ASS IF HE DOES NOT APOLOGIZE FOR WHAT HE DID. IT WON'T BE THE GOOD-FEELING KIND OF "HAND-UP-ASS" EITHER.
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
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