I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
I've officially moved beyond college drinking. I just got business drunk at an internship seminar.
He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.
I'm sorry for throwing the cheese everywhere, but it wasn't my fault. No one was enforcing disipline so not really my fault for not behaving
I officially lit my glove on fire while lighting the bong. Winter needs to end.
I figured you left because I was a shit show. Were you still there when I got locked in the bathroom and didn't know where I was? If not, that could have been a dream. I'm still not sure.
The Medal of Honor you banged could be at the inauguration today. You really dropped the ball on keeping up with that one.
I'm still drunk. I put on workout clothes this morning and just puked in my bathroom. That's the same as going to the gym, right?
You have amazing self restraint. If there was one thing I could learn from you, that wouldn't be it. I love my life as it is.
There are many penises to be discovered and claimed tonight
We're like Lewis and Clark
sometimes you just gotta eat tacobell at 2am and cry all your feelings out
WHO DOES THAT ON A TUESDAY? This is not a Drake joke, the girl doesn't turn up OR down. She doesn't do anything.
You know it's a good night when the word slut is imprinted on your ass and your hands smell like lube.
I'm so high right now that I winked back at a character in this TV show.
The lady in the stall next to me just screamed "why are you so hairy!?" and "why can't you get any!?" to her vagina. WTF
Randomize
