I feel like I just won at life, no connection sex and free 12 pack of beer after. Does life give out trophies, if so I want a big one.
Its official, cigarettes are now more expensive than weed
I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
for future reference: playing drunken strip-twister is a euphemism for a threesome. just thought you should know.
Making jello shots drunk, i apologize ahead of time if they are too strong Can't taste anything.
When you guys came back from the bar, I thought everyone was a T-Rex - Thats why i was hiding under the table. Never doing shrooms with Drunk people again
In case you're keeping score at home, this is Brad's SECOND Doritos-related trip to the ER.
They invited me day drinking but brought their kids. 3 two year olds and 1 11 month old. I was asked to change a diaper, I laughed and took another drink of this margarita. I LIKE CHANEL AND TEQUILA NOT CHILDREN. Can we make new friends?
The bong is packed and it's taco Tuesday come over
I think we need to stage a munchie intervention for Ben. I just watched him use a tortilla as a potholder to dump water out of his ramen.
He said he remembers me...standing on a snowy roof, smoking a blunt, yelling "you're pretty fly for a white guy" at him. Sounds about right.
You rinsed the beer pong ball off in my White Russian
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
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