Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
So I woke up today with someone's door knob in my pocket. I hope everbody else got out of the house ok.
Slept on the counter again. Mom covered me in an apron.
Hey wes just called me saying he was asleep outside by the pond at my apt complex
Wine floats aren't as good of an idea as they seem
as of this morning I have officially vommed on the highways of 6 different countries. It's a proud moment.
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
I miss my brother. He would have fucked the fat girl for me.
I told you I would
I wouldnt do that to you. You're my actual friend
My dick can't jump between your dick and her mouth, man. It's impossible, I think.
We left the bar and you kept yelling "ONWARD SCION, TO GLORY!!"
I've spent all afternoon taking and editing selfies. The life of a bimbo is truly tiring.
man fuck you i am a delight. you're the one who fucking set his tree on fire while high
I can't tell if my heart is fluttering because I love him... or if it's palpitating from all the coke.
Randomize
