??? When I first met her at the bar, she told me she was 23. After I bought her 3 shots of tequila, she told me she was really only 21. When we went back to my house, she said she was really only 19. She's still sleeping next to me butt naked. I'm afraid if she opens her mouth again I could be looking at 10 years.
Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
Should I tell her she gave me head in the kitchen while I was eating a cupcake or would that hurt her dignity too much?
Oh nbd. She just had sex with a divorcee. On a charter bus. At 10 a.m. On a Thursday.
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
Nothing bad can happen when you have a kiwi flavored condom. Absolutely nothing.
Just sent my cousin to buy me a new bra cause mine is zip tied to a bar in the middle of nowhere Iowa
Hey, taking organic chemistry means no one is allowed to tell you you're partying too hard.
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
what the hell makes you think you get to decide what your going to wear at our weding!?
I've had sex near too many of the blankets to let our parents touch them like this
Dude, tumbleweeds have been rolling through my bed lately. This is my dryest dry spell since I was married.
I was cock-blocked by a swat team last night.
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