Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
youre so sexy i want your bod
dude, did you turn gay?
heather?
this is jacob
Note to self. Never fart in a tanning bed
I skipped work to stalk him.
seriously i just wanna be friends
pass
u were so high that u chewed on candle wax for an hour
Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
found a ham sandwich in the elevator it tasted so hungry and it was still fresh. dont be mad at me. you know you love ham.
I wish we could tell the moving van to wait at the strip club for a while.
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
This santa hat i wore to the bar, served it's dual purpose as a vomit bag.
I fucking give up. OKC is where small penises go to disappoint me.
I left the guinea pigs on the dryer. Make sure to take care of them.
Do you want to talk about dinosaurs?
He's a waste of a perfectly good penis.
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