Your tits are I can't wait for
It wasn't long before I skipped the martini glass and went straight to drinking from the shaker.
I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
i just made my gag reflex go away.
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
The way I'm gonna look at it is, if you don't makeout with your roommate once in college, you didn't do something right.
This costume is too restrictive. The priest and I cannot get it on while I am wearing it.
....I feel like you are deciding whether or not I'm good enough for you based on what I ordered from Chipotle.
I dont even think your gonna like what I got you for christmas. If not we can take it back and get drugs.
It's hot as dicks out. Lets get drunk on the roof and make pterodactyl sounds at people.
Sorry you had to clean the sheets with your macro notes
And then he said, "let's have sex and I'll send you home with enchiladas."
Today was brought to you by the letter B for beer and bourbon and the number fuck you I'm meant to be studying not hungover
If you can give me an orgasm, you'll get a trophy.
I don't know where you went, but if you're anywhere near the liquor, pour me another drink
Randomize
