Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
I like to use the word "seasoned" over "slutty", you know, like a good curly fry
My vag wants to play a game of hungry hungry hippos with your cock.
Ok I won't set anything on fire if you wear pants all night. This is a bet we're both destined to lose.
just had to re-breakup with her. it was like shooting a dead horse that was crying and talking.
I have a feeling that watching gay porn with you was the reason I was dancing in a hurricane of floating dicks in my dream last night.
He took a shot, then proceeded to puke into the bucket he was iceing his broken foot in
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
After Thursday my breakup "don't screw anybody out of respect" month will be over and I will be set loose. My pussy is purring with anticipation.
He was all like, "I've prayed every single day just for one more night with you."
Omg just give him a quick handy and walk out.
You were crying because you hate wine coolers but you really wanted to prove you could finish it
I'm drunk in a place called Lick-A-Chick. PS. It's not a lesbian hot spot, they sell chicken.
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
So, 'head before the store' turned into a fuck fest, & that's how I ended up at the grocery store smelling like a cum farm on Black Friday. How's your weekend?
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