No - a douche bag is not a fashion accessory. They do not make Gucci Douchebags
I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
I just saw a wasted dude crawl out of the road at 2 in the afternoon. Big question- still drunk from the weekend or hitting the soju already?
Im going to hell in a hand basket. With a ribbon tied to my head. I'll be like a puppy for the devil.
I'm sorry for the texts and anything that I said that may have caused confusion, pain or irritation. I shall not be drinking again. Furthermore I will not be keeping a phone on me should I fail to adhere to the prior statement.
Imma do me. And by that, I mean I'm going to walk across campus still drunk at 9am on a Tuesday.
My underwear said "hard to get" on the butt. He laughed when he took them off.
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
Hahaha she was way into you and you kept arguing about burritos. It was amazing.
It was a mess. I sat on the kitchen floor with maple whiskey and cried into a bowl of poutine. I've never even been to canada
You had sex with him AND his man bun. Like not just him but also the bun.
He fucked me over, so I'm going to do what any rational woman does. I'm going to get really high and have sex with his brother.
It's official. Post baseball sex is better than post hockey sex. I hope the Blue Jays win the world series.
ive started thanking my toys after masturbating. might be time to get some fuck boys
Looking back at our past texts, the minute it turned 2020 you were cleaning your house and I was dying of the cold. We were prophesying the Rona.
Randomize
