just hooked up with an air force officer in a hotel room paid for by the military. i feel like i should go around thanking taxpayers for the assist.
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
she just threw a smoke bomb in an elevator and ran down 9 flights of stairs to see it at the bottom.
So....maintenance found the bullethole.....
Just thought i should tell someone im on the roof, if i pass out up here because no one found me, im behind the chimney
I'm glad we have the kind of friendship where if either of us is too drunk to fuck a hot guy, we pass the responsibility to each other and get the job done.
I just re read that. We really need to get our lives together.
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
that's like... drinking popov and saying its the worlds best vodka. you gotta try some others first. THERE SHOULD BE A MISS AMERICA PAGEANT. but like, mr penis. and they can do tricks and make unintelligent remarks and wear sparkly condoms.
Well he just said "there's glass on the floor and it's okay I'm only bleeding out of my esophagus" so yes he's tripping
I said geronimo as I came I'm not sure if he appreciated the doctor who reference or was just confused
time out. can we just pause the wholesome understanding friendship thing and be fuck buddies for a night?
we need a secret handshake
Just woke up from an extremely erotic dream featuring Steve Buscemi. Now I can't sleep.
Do not try to steal a picnic table from a park, all you will end up with are sore arms and broken dreams.
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
It's like the perfect sandwich, once you find it you want to ensure your future access to it.
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