"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
she doesn't hate you. She just thinks you need a personality adjustment, speech therapy and weight watchers.
I don't really want to write this paper. It's the last one of the semester - I need to savor the feeling of procrastination.
True friendship; bangin a girl to get ur friends hat back
Way too hungover to be taking this many family pictures
Just woke up with three stitches in my left boob. Nevertheless, I think I'm going to like this school.
Hindsight: Dressing up in nothing but a bra, booty shorts, and police tape made for the most awkward walk of shame of my life.
Also. When I die, I'm gonna have them put me in the casket naked and then have an open casket funeral. That will be my last chance to make people uncomfortable.
I walked home with him, but I had to pee...so I did...as we walked. He was so drunk he didn't even notice. Good thing I was in a dress.
He stumbled out of the bathroom with his pants around his ankles yelling "tie my shooes!"
we got stoned then he started showing me how to make his penis look like a hamburger...if that's not true love idk what love is
I tried to put my heels in the coat check
Thursday is not a good day to become a felon... It's bingo night
You don't know being judged until its 7:30 in the morning and you're on 2 hours of sleep halfway between drunk and hungover wearing pajama pants at an international airport while saying how proud you are that you found the airport's bar immediately and how disappointed you are that it's closed
She really wants to put my dick in her mouth, and to be honest I really don't want to put it there.
Randomize