You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
R you on birth control?
No, why?
...no reason
so her cute freckles turned out to be blackheads
Just woke up in a hotel next to a 38 year old mom who's married... I think Spring Break has started
My poo smells like dog food. That's how I know it was a good night.
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
Crying in the liquor store is not a good look
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
Guess which fraternity was just playing car to car frisbee in the McDonald's drive thru! Did you guess mine?
Did I get stoned on a sunday afternoon and speak to someone on the phone for an hour about cats and their behaviour? Glad you asked. And yes.
Things you Cant unsee: When your smartphone syncs to your dads laptop and downloads photos...including his porn stash.
She broke up with me. I guess I was in the most chaste lesbian relationship in the history of the world and had no idea.
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
I'm drunk but I just ate 2 heads of broccoli so does that mean it evens out?
Yes absolutlely
Complete and utter failure. 100% unsalvageable. I have not failed so hard at a culinary endeavor in YEARS. MY HONOR IS IMPUGNED I HAVE SHAMED MY HOUSE
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