Sometimes I get depressed that my son is too young to understand how hot his babysitter is.
adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
she added me on facebook and her celebrity doppelganger is rosie odonnel. FUCK
I'm also annoyed at my horoscope for not warning me of my perils
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
Is she okay?
She may want to issue revenge punches, but medically fine.
This girl just said she was late for class because she was having sex.
For a second I thought that you were becoming a decent person again. I am glad I was wrong.
I shamewalked barefoot this morning and the Dos Equis delivery guy judged the shit out of me.
good news, i've got tacos. bad news, kevin's in the ER. more good news, the tacos were free.
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
it was a 'fall asleep on the bathroom floor after puking bc the cold tile is legit more comfortable than your bed' kind of night.
So there we are, fucking beneath the Christmas tree and I glance up and see one of the local Jehovah's witnesses staring in horror through the decorative glass in the front door. I'm so proud of us.
Randomize
