You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
I cant wait for the day that I tell my daughter I named her after my favorite porn star.
If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
we were exchanging secrets last night... she told me about how she put markers in her vaj in middle school. found a keeper.
maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
they ran out of ice so they are using frozen shrimp in their drinks
I thought your voice was coming from the walls. I've never been so relieved to find you naked in a closet
Itd be like fucking a waterbed thats been locked in a barn for two years.
Where in the FUCK do you get your analogies
He was still there when I ran half naked into my suitemate's room where she was skyping her boyfriend and I started singing I JUST HAD SEEEEX
I kept resisting the urge to yell "2 for 2!" so they could hear me on the other side of the wall.
U have successfully fucked my brains out. I just almost put deodorant on like chapstick
You thanked your mom for the gymnastic lessons so you could do a keg stand
It also means I'm watching porn with mario earphones so i can hear. Possibly the best way to mastrabate EVER
His dick has the same name as my pipe. I'm keeping him forever.
Sorry didnt text you yesterday. had to put restraining order on my ex.
Randomize
