Swine flu. Run for my life!
i had a dream the other night i was titty fucking you while you were asleep, then you woke up and didn't care.
i don't know where i am. i made bad decisions. i think this guy is dead.
When the doctor said the anal leakage might not be reversible without some lifestyle changes you start asking if it's worth the entertainment value.
Dude I walked 1.4 miles through the hotel wearing a cowboy hat, pink topped boots, gucci shades, and a scarf and met my parents in the hallway at 7 am how is this not a good start to Vegas?
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
i decided if i had to, i could survive with only 3 fingers on each hand.
Getting day drunk before work is perfectly acceptable when its 99 cent margaritas.
I'm daydrinking whiskey in a princess hat
How do I tell my hairdresser I want a hair style I saw in a porn video?
The dick pic bandit just sent me a poem about showering..
Walking actually physically hurts. We should do it again some time.
I told you naked hot tub wrestling would turn bad now one of us has a gash on the head and another a black eye
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
Randomize
