I am like the Mr. Miyagi of queefs.
He just kept muttering to himself "stabby stabby stabby stabby" while we were boning. I will never be boning him again.
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
i licked the inside of a toilet bowl for $14. i really can't talk about my night.
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
my nipple ring is gone but someone was nice enough to replace it with a paperclip
You look me right in the eyes and yelled "By the power of the superglue beer sword, I designate you my driver!" I almost felt honored.
They need to leave so I can start drinking shamefully.
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
My mom just said we can't get married in nude body suits to look like earthworms. She's ruining my life.
like, you weren't just lying there, you were wrapped in what appeared to be the skin of a wolf, chanting doomsday prophecies
THE END IS NEIGH
After finding out he was married when we were together, I don't trust him.
I mean, I'm not upset that HE's getting married, I'm upset his penis has to go through with it by default
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
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